John Heaton (jheaton) wrote,
John Heaton

  • Music:

Ten random things: May 3

Ten crimes alleged to have been committed during the Mifflin Street Block Party this weekend:

  1. Battery to a police officer
  2. Fourth-degree sexual assault
  3. Possession of cocaine
  4. Theft
  5. Possession with intent to deliver a schedule II narcotic
  6. Disorderly conduct
  7. Procuring for, or furnishing alcohol for underage persons
  8. Possession of drug paraphernalia
  9. Armed robbery
  10. Strangulation

The Mifflin Street Block Party is a venerable Madison institution where thousands of University of Madison students cram themselves into a four-block area and drink themselves stupid. Or, I should say, stupider. This year's Block Party was epic in its rowdiness; according to the news article that served as a source for this list, "In total, the police said they arrested 162 people on 204 tentative charges. Of those arrested, 12 went to jail. Among the tickets were 12 for open intoxicants, 69 for underage possession or consumption, 24 for deposit human waste and 43 for glass-free zone violations." Among the 146 people who were tested for their blood alcohol level, 107, or 73%, tested in excess of 0.1%. Twenty-nine of those tested above 0.2%, and three of them were above 0.3%.

Oh, and two people were stabbed, one almost to death. There's a suspect in the near-fatal stabbing, but the people have not yet been able to establish probable cause, "primarily because possible witnesses were intoxicated." As for the other stabbing, that victim received a non-life threatening wound to the buttocks. "Honestly, I was pretty drunk," the victim told police. "I think I blacked out." Anyway, the point is it was a big mess and the city's political leadership is up in arms and vowing to do something about it, which is pretty remarkable given the huge role alcohol consumption plays in Wisconsin culture. Seriously, they have beer tents at church picnics around here.

Incidentally, in case you were wondering what constitutes "fourth-degree sexual assault, it's telling your victim, "I'm a record producer," before shoving your hand down her shirt. The groping part more so than the record producer part, I presume.

Tags: lists of ten things, wisconsin: madison

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