Ten things my sister plans to do as a member of the McFarland Village Board:
- Encourage infill development and redevelopment in the downtown area
- Lead an armed invasion of Blooming Grove
- Expand the tax base by successfully implementing the Terminal Drive / Triangle Area Neighborhood Plan
- Sue McFarland, California, and McFarland, Kansas, for trademark infringement
- Improve parks and conservancy areas and expand recreation opportunities
- Establish a riverboat casino on the Yahara River
- Paint the oil tanks on the edge of town Carolina blue
- Use TIF funds to help businesses develop and redevelop in TID #3
- Impose a strict five-year statute of limitations on jokes about stuff you did when you were a little kid
- Change the village motto to, "I hate green beans!"
Luckily, the statute of limitations will not apply to me, as I am not a resident of McFarland.