John Heaton (jheaton) wrote,
John Heaton

  • Music:

Ten random things: November 19

Look! This is me being too lazy to compose a list.

Ten facts about jheaton:

  1. jheaton once finished "The Song that Never Ends".
  2. jheaton can judge a book by its cover.
  3. jheaton is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
  4. jheaton can divide by zero.
  5. jheaton can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"
  6. jheaton can hold his breathe for nine years.
  7. jheaton has 3 knees on each leg.
  8. jheaton has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.
  9. jheaton can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
  10. jheaton once impregnated a woman by pointing to her and saying, "boo-yah."

Discover facts about yourself here.


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